Saturday, August 29, 2009

Orders galore!

This is always a funny one. It will cost a little bit of money, but if you really want to get the person fired, it might just take this kind of dedication! Go to a bunch of websites where you can order adult magazines and adult products. Then begin to have those adult products shipped to your place of work. But make sure the address is as general as possible so that the explicit material passes by as many people as it can. For example put the address to your office but don't put the suite number so that someone has to look your enemy up and find which office their in. Some ideas for products are magazines like penthouse and playboy, and boxes of condoms and lube. These types of products are sure to offend the women in the office and hopefully the men too, and if enough of these products are shipped to the office, the man will be warned and eventually fired. Make sure that all of the stuff is in his or her name and that they can't trace it back to your credit card. It might even be especially safe to go buy the stuff with cash and personally ship it to your office. Just make sure you don't have distinguishable hand writing! You want it to look like they have been ordering it online and having it sent to the office. Even if they deny it, if enough stuff is shipped the boss will probably get tired of it, and fire them. Try it out. It will be awesome seeing their face as their secretary hands them a penthouse in disgust!

It is completely impersonal and will at a minimum make them look really bad and be a great source of office gossip for many months.

It is a great opportunity to make them look like they like really weird sexual stuff.

It could cost a pretty penny...

This is a really effective way of getting anyone fired, regardless of position. Most companies would rather fire an executive than deal with a sexual harassment case. If you buy enough crude things, it could definitely become a sexual harassment issue. Despite the cost this is a very effective method!

Sunday, June 28, 2009

The Boss is a Cunt!

As I was filtering through some of our user suggestions, I came across this suggestion and I almost fell out of my chair laughing... haha! I'm not sure how effective this method would actually be, but it would at least give you something to laugh about for the next couple of months! Create a fake email address and send them this link. Give it a provocative, personal subject line, to make sure they read it, and then tell them to make sure they have they're volume all the way up! Nuff said...

The Top Ten Cutest Kittens!

The "One Sided" Convo

This is one of my favorite ways to "Cyber Stalk." The great thing about email address' is that you can create an infinite amount of them and they're all free. Besides that, they're virtually impossible to trace. In this method of getting someone fired, you can create a whole bunch of email accounts with various companies, i.e. gmail, yahoo, aol etc. then begin sending the person personalized emails with all sorts of illicit information or pictures. Send the emails with a bunch of personal information about their job and life so that there is no doubt that you know them. Also word them as if they are responses to emails sent to you. If the boss thinks that the person is asking for those emails it will surely get them fired. After you have sent a bunch of them to his or her work account, copy the boss onto one of them, and then add a couple other fake email addresses that are similar, to make it look like a typo i.e. (real boss) (fake email address). In the one you copy the boss on (or multiple ones), make sure you say something really negative about the boss in a responsive way.... like " Oh and by the way, I can't believe you have such an asshole boss! If I were you I would take a huge crap on his desk" This way the boss feels like your coworker has been talking crap about him, and he got lucky enough to be copied in on the conversation. Then hopefully the boss will check their email account and find a whole bunch of emails with porno, crude jokes about his or her spouse and sexual jokes about other co-workers. Even though there won't be any evidence that they sent any emails, if there are a slew of emails seemingly responding to their emails, the boss should be convinced that they have been using work time to send personal emails from their work account, and fire them! Below is an example of a response email...

" Hey John,

You're boss does sound like a shit head!!! I agree, a severe beating in the parking lot would at least let him know that you don't give a fuck! But you don't want to get fired, no matter how much you think it sucks! Did You talk to Chrissie the other day? Every time I think of her, I crack up! I'm still waiting for the day you try to get in her pants, no matter how fat you think she is haha. Well anyways, gotta go brother, call me later! Let me know how the Chrissie thing goes!


ps I attached those pictures of janice naked that you wanted! Tell me what you think! Babe huh?"

It can totally work, and personal involvement is almost completely unnecessary.
If your boss is a really proud person, it could result in a huge inter-office confrontation!

The boss could say, "Well since there is no proof of you actually sending the emails, I'll believe you are getting set up."

Summary: Overall I think this is a great method! It completely removes the actual victim from the equation. Even if there is no proof that they sent any emails, if you make the responses personal enough, it will just look like the other guy is deleting his sent mail box to hide his illicit emails. In addition to that, no one will ever discover that the emails being sent to you are actually from you (as long as you set the accounts up with fake names and contact email address')!

Thursday, June 18, 2009

Operation Shock and Call

This idea is great if you have access to a phone all day long, and nobody monitors your calls. If the person you want to get fired is a low level, easily replaced, piss-ant... than this method should work. Get the number to their work, and begin to call every thirty minutes. Make up a fake ex-boyfriend/girlfriend's, friend's etc. and keep making up excuses to call. Don't call them directly, but keep calling the general line... or even their bosses line. At first, they will actually try to transfer you. To avoid having any awkward moments with the person you are trying to get fired... just hang up after they try to transfer you. Make sure you block your number though, because if you don't they might actually just call the cops. Your number can be easily blocked by simply dialing *67 before you dial the number. This will block your number on the caller id as well as there bill, so there's no chance they will be able to figure out who it is!

*67 404-555-9077

Most of the time, if this person can be easily replaced, the boss would rather just fire them, than put up with the repeated calls. It might take you a week or two of calling all day long, but eventually it will work! And it will feel great! Especially because they are sitting helpless, as they watch themselves get called right out of a job! Genius!

Pro's: 1. It's easy and it costs no money.
2. It also requires very little if any confrontation.
3. It has almost no consequences if you get caught (as long as you don't say anything weird or threatening when you call... which isn't even needed. The actual calling will be enough on it's own)

Con's: 1. It requires patience, as it might take a week or two of calling all day long.
2. It probably won't work with more important positions, i.e. bosses, owners etc..

Summary: It's an effective way to get a low level employee fired in an office setting.

The Classic Drug Bust

This is an obvious one, and a little bit risky... But you can always just plant drugs on them! Go down to your neighborhood drug dealer, buy some gonja, oxycotton, heroin etc... and stick it in their desk drawer when they're in the can. After they get back, call the boss anonymously and rat the person out. Don't worry about the guilt... remember all's fair in love and revenge! If you really want to get them back, split the drugs up into tiny bags and add a little cash... This will result in a felony and will make it look like they were intending to sell it. Then they'll be in real trouble! haha Awesome!!!

Pro's: 1. It will most likely get them fired (unless their boss is a stoner/ tweaker/ cokehead in which he might just ask the person to share)

Con's: 1. If you get caught buying the drugs you could go to jail.
2. Planting drugs on someone is probably a pretty big crime.
3. If you get caught preparing the drugs, i.e. splitting them up in little baggies, and adding cash, it will probably just look like you're the one trying to sell the drugs, and will result in you getting the felony... party foul!

Summary: A very viable but still risky option. If you already have the drugs, the risk might be worth the reward!

What we're all about!

This blog is intended to be an informative, educational and funny resource on ways to get people fired. We believe that all people should have, in their arsenal, several methods for getting someone fired. This way, if someone pisses you off enough, you can retaliate occupationally. We are always taking suggestions... so if you have a story about how you got someone fired, or how you were set up, send them our way, and if they're good/ funny enough we will post them for all of our thousands of readers to see. Thanks for your support, and please link to us, and tell your friends about us! We want this site to be as helpful is it can be! By reading this blog you are taking full responsibility for your actions! We are only offering funny ideas for entertainment purposes only. We only host other people's ideas, and we do not come up with our own. If one of the ideas we host is used to get somebody fired... it is completely the person's fault as they took our site way too seriously.